"The "dark night of the soul" in a spiritual context refers to a period of intense inner turmoil, spiritual desolation, and doubt, often experienced as a necessary step on the path to deeper spiritual growth and transformation"
broward horne
I was halfway through my "Dark Night Of The Soul" before I even knew the term. The onset was gradual so its start is a guess...perhaps 2011 at Aetna in Hartford, CT, which makes sense because that's when I wrote off women and "career" aspirations. The ending is harder... perhaps 2017/2018 after my sister died and left our mother to me.
In 2013 I visited a local psychic and after thirty minutes of questions she sighed and said, "There's nothing I can tell you about your future except to change it somehow".
My father died in 2014, I moved back to Idaho to set my mom and sister on a positive path but both preferred to drown in the sorrows of the past. Three years later my sister suicided and I was back to clean up three generations of hoarding.
Normies killed my sister. Petty, dishonest people and I read through a few hundred pages of lawsuits she'd filed. Many discoverable identities who could be dealt justice but I burned it all. It would be too easy to obsess over it.
The internet was enormous fun for a couple decades but it's mostly dead to me now. Transformed into a galactic high school of petty, ignorant cliques and resentful moderators.
I'm lucky I got those twenty prime years of fun and smiles.
But all things come to an end, even empires.
I suppose that I might believe
in mankind again, someday
but it's difficult
to imagine.
A more esoteric thing I've learned is that
- some things can't be fixed
- other things can
- and a few things can but shouldn't be
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